How to Comprehend Women

Understanding women can be a great challenge--one that I've found requires skills to exceed my own. Thus, I decided that I would try to take an indirect route and seek this understanding through analogy. I figured that I could state some characteristics of women, find something else that shares those characteristics, and acquire an understanding of the more attractive half of the world's humans by studying that which carries the same characteristics.

So, I'll commence by describing a few traits of women. They are beautiful and fascinating. They are vitally important to the way the world works. However, I also find them to be quite irrational.

The question, then, is what else exhibits these same characteristics. The answer, of course, is the square root of 2:
Beautiful? Certainly to those who see the beauty of logic and physics.
Fascinating? Undoubtedly. It has all kinds of purposes, such as multiplying by the length of a leg to find the length of the hypotenuse of an isosceles right triangle.
Vitally important to the way the world works? All math is.
Irrational? Yes, the square root of 2 is an irrational number (look it up if you don't know what this means).
Thus, we conclude beyond doubt that women are like the square root of 2.

This is where we encounter a problem. See, the approximate value of the square root of 2 is 1.414, but this is not exact. In fact, if you continue to try calculating it, you will find that it goes on forever, adding additional numbers beyond the decimal point. No matter how long you study, how long you calculate, you can never have the joy of putting the precise value of the square root of 2 in decimal form. The digits go on into infinity.

This is the enlightening part, for when one understands infinity, they can thus understand the power of the square root of 2 as an analogy to women. Infinity has some unusual characteristics, most notably that any finite number, no matter how vast, when divided by infinity, will result in a number that is basically zero (essentially as close to zero as a number could possibly become without actually reaching it).

Therefore, no matter how many digits of the square root of 2 you have calculated, you are, for all practical purposes, 0% of the way toward finding the exact value.

Thus it is as trying to understand women. There are books, conversations, and other such that will teach you more about them, and it's perfectly reasonable for men to double, triple, or even ten times their amount of knowledge of women. However, as with finding the exact value of the square root of 2, whatever numerical value could be attached to your knowledge of women, it would always be divided by infinity.

We can therefore conclude that after any finite amount of studying and experience, a man will always have a 0% understanding of women.

Okay, going for weekly posts

So, I cast my thoughts about and decided that I'm going to try for weekly entertaining/informative (hopefully both) posts. I plan to pack each one with a significant amount of awesomeness, so be prepared.

EDIT: Okay, the weekly thing failed, but at least they're better than semi-annually.

Dual-wielding blogs

"Oh great! Now Josh is doing two blogs when we already have to put the number of days between updates in scientific notation"

The reason I'm running a second blog is because it's hosted on gamasutra.com, which means that it gets read by other game developers. Therefore, if I'm going to do a long, well-thought-out blog on game development, I will post it here: http://www.gamasutra.com/blogs/JoshuaMcDonald/2936/

Anything else I blog will remain on the website that thou art currently gazing upon.

And for my final bit, I will now link to one of the funniest things I have ever read: http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/04/alot-is-better-than-you-at-everything.html

Farewell and enjoy being a human.

Battleforge: The amazing game that nobody has ever heard of

So a few years ago, EA decided to work on shedding their image as a money-grubbing corporation or fund some titles that were unique and interesting. The most often mentioned of these are Mirror's Edge and Dead Space, but the best one by far is a game that nobody ever seems to even know about.

In a nutshell, Battleforge is what you get when you cross Warcraft (the RTS, not the MMO) with Magic: The Gathering...except better. Instead of being tied to a few strict faction choices, you have interesting and dynamic decks that you build yourself. Almost all of the conventions of RTS's have been dropped, and the mechanics that were built up provide an amazing amount of tactical depth, even if you're just using the free-to-play starter cards.

It is, in fact, the only RTS where I've ever been able to get into PvP. All of the others simply have a narrow range of "best" strategies that everybody uses, to the point where you get more variety playing skirmishes against the computer than fighting other people. Battleforge, on the other hand, has a deck building system and low-tier tactics that keep PvP games varied. Every time you think you have a feel for what you'll be up against, somebody else will come out with some bizarre tactic that completely throws you off and makes you reconsider what is possible in the game.

Really, everybody reading this should try it. The free to play game is well worth the time, and after spending a bit of cash on the game ($40-$60), you'll really have something amazing.

Why shooter survival modes are so successful (and how to apply the principle to other games)

I'm not sure who started it, but over the past few couple years, every shooter adds in a survival mode, and player response tends to be extremely positive. In my own case, I'm a huge fan of Gears of War 2, but I've never touched the campaign: I just play horde mode.

If you analyze these against prevailing viewpoints on what makes a game good, you would expect them to be generally uninteresting: No story, no character development, no puzzles, unchanging landscape, etc. So how is it that you can cut most of a game out and find something that many people like even better than what you originally created?

First, survival mode is pure core gameplay. All of the things I listed above can be fun, but they can also be a distraction from the fun (if the core game is good enough). If you want to sit down and shoot some stuff, you don't have to wait for cutscenes or play "Simon Says". Further, instead of trying to learn new landscape, you're focusing on developing tactics for an environment that you're already familiar with. Basically, survival mode just focuses on the best part of the game and tosses out the rest.

Second, survival mode is less scripted. Many of us don't feel much satisfaction from following the pre-planned track that the designers came up with. In campaigns, vehicles, weapons, cover placement, and many other things are carefully placed so that each player runs through roughly the same experience. In survival mode, sure there's careful placement, but there isn't a clear path or much of a "best" method. It falls on the player's shoulders to find the method that works best for him in a given situation.

Finally, survival mode has unlimited (or at least absurdly high) difficulty potential. Shooters tend to do a better job of implementing high difficulties than most games do (though you always have that crowd who wants something harder), but even in those, the situation is often so scripted that there's not much room to formulate new strategies (i.e. if you can't get headshots off faster, this part will always be impossible on top difficulty).

With that in mind, there's no reason that similar gameplay modes couldn't be made for different genres. Viewtiful Joe could have had an amazingly cool survival mode for a minuscule amount of development time. Zelda could have a carefully crafted room that allowed you to make use of all of your gadgets in some wild, long-term fights.

Finally, this would be an awesome feature to add to RPGs, particularly those with a higher tactical potential. In games like Baldur's Gate, Final Fantasy, or Fire Emblem, I'm constantly working to develop the perfect, super-powered group, but the only thing I can do with it is play out the script (with the occasional side-quest thrown in). In fact, if I'm successful in making my super-party, the game becomes really easy.

When you've finished carrying your party through a 40+ hour scenario, it would be cool to have a gameplay mode simply designed to test how awesome you managed to make them. Heck, I'd probably replay some RPG's in their entirety with my entire focus devoted to making a group that could get as far in this special mode as possible.

Overall, I believe that in nearly all games (at least good games), there can be a lot of added value for little cost by adding in a pure gameplay mode. I just hope that more designers start to see the potential.